and I wish I could cure it. Wish there was a medication for it so I can just inject and let the disease die.
It broke my heart to hear my mother cry all day yesterday. She just kept crying for the friend of hers who is going through so much, and for the husband that did what he did. She cried for the little girl. She cried for everyone in this world, telling me that she wishes people would be stronger and find God. She doesn’t hate the man. (now you know where I my heart from) She doesn’t even wish him death or even wish him hell. She just cried when he found out he would be in jail for 20 years for the deeds he acted upon and wishes that during those years he would come out a better man. She cried and cried and cried.
I didn’t know how to feel about that situation. She had a hard time telling me what had happened. The world is such an ugly place. but I do try to believe in humanity.
I love children and it made me so upset to hear the story of what had happened. I love kids so much and I would do anything for them. Even a day before my birthday, I went over to my friends place and donated my books for her siblings who lacked the support of education from their parents because they are working all the time. If I had million of dollars, the first thing I would do is to help others because making others happy, makes me happy (I probably got this trait from my grandfather and my mother).
Even though I lack with connecting to people in a deep level, I still know how to show love when I need to. Especially to the elderly and to the younger generation. The one’s I don’t respect are teenagers to young adults because mainly, this is the point of life where you get to mold your life the way you want it. The decisions they make is upon them, and the path they take as well.
I hate going to nursing home to see elderly being put in there cause their children’s don’t want to take care of them no more. It makes me so angry because I met few who hasn’t seen their kids for years. And there I was spending time with them, trying to make them smile..so at least they felt like they had a visitor. It did made me more sad though, cause a week later or a month later, they pass away.
God.. my head hurts. I’m just so disappointed with people. Everything annoys me now these days. Especially when I see people selfishness, it automatically turns me off so much. Now I know people aren’t perfect but my tolerance for people are getting lower and lower. So far things that annoy me are racism, stuck up, cheaters, homewreckers, spoiled brats, people with no respect, voilent people, manipulators, people who are so desperate for relationships (i really get ANNOYED with this one the most, so now you know), and its goes on and on and on.
I can’t wait for the day I can just get up and leave.